Monday 21 June 2010

Two steps forward...

In the immortal words of Homer (Simpson), "Doh!". 

No sooner had I published the post on my mediation on ancestral healing than an article on that very topic landed in my In Box.  "Aha!" I thought, "I must be on the right track, if the same unusual subject matter is suddenly appearing in my world." 

Then I read it.

Hmmm! This lady basically says that it is no one's obligation or responsiblity to undertake the healing of others and, indeed, if we choose to do so, we rob them of the wisdom and insight that emerges when we heal: when we forgive past pains, when we release judgements, when we are compassionate to the failings of ourselves and others. 

"Doh!  I'm on the wrong track!" I thought. 

But as I thought about it more deeply over the weekend, two insights emerged.  The first insight is a reminder that we are all different and so, what is one person's meat is aonther person's poison.  A tool that works for one person, may not be appropriate for another.  For this reason, it's always best to follow our internal wisdom, our deeper sense of 'knowing'.  And if we don't know, then allowing ourselves the luxury of patience until we do know, is a wise move.

The second insight was that this woman was doing the healing on behalf of her ancestors.  In the meditation that unfolded for me, I was simply sitting alongside the ancestors and inviting them to let go of ideas and thoughts that no longer served them or subsequent generations.  I was a witness to them forgiving themselves and others, I didn't do it for them.

Doing something for someone and supporting them while they do it, are very different processes with very different outcomes.  Doing something for someone can rob them of the opportunity to develop wisdom, insight and independence.  It implies that we know better than they do - but who are we to judge what is right for another person, even if it is a loved one?

Supporting someone as they take action, being their witness, allows them to make their own mistakes (just as we make our mistakes) and these can be a valuable lesson.  I'm not saying we become passive, or step back from sharing our opinions, but that we honour their right to choose: their right to learn in their own way. 

The universe is far more subtle, complex and balanced than our human brains can comprehend.  And just because salty sea water is the perfect lifestyle choice for one fish, does not mean that it's the perfect environment for a freshwater fish.  It would, in fact, slowly kill the fresh water fish.

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